bleach baby beach bones
walking down the boygirl burial sand
I step on a fury of roses
thorns from the vine
of casket-strength sea spines
tail of tales of sting-ray die-off
sun's rays sea's rays sting rays
risibly risking sun and waves
of denial anger grief
the long spike spiked
with shark tooth hunger
red sun rising in a weather bloom
off my foot rose madder
and madder and madder still life
blood nor pain are lightfast
offshore seals moan
what's my tune sharp scaled
staccato of bones
The Sunday Muse
Ah, paradise can be deadly.
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You word craft and play here are brilliant Qbit! It is like a warning or vision set to poetry. Amazing poetry as always!
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Thank you so much!
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Ah, the tales to be told at the seashore…on the one hand serene and peaceful, on the other a cautionary tale of sting and spike. Red sun rising beware. “Red sky at morning, sailors take warning; red sky at night, sailor’s delight”.
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Yep, LOL!
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thorns from the vine
of casket-strength sea spines
tail of tales of sting-ray die-off
For me I see a vision of risky beach goers. There is a silent killer walking the beach sands and the waters. Who will feel the sting of sun or ray?
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Sorry about the comment, I guess I am having a bad day!
You did an excellent job with the tale of tails. I once saw a giant manta ray in the water.
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It was a perfectly fine! Glad you were seeing it with a different perspective,
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Huge kudos from me …. I tried reading it aloud quickly realized it is a total tongue twister.
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Hahaha! Yep! Glad you tried it aloud. I wrote it reading it aloud over and over as I went.
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A rush of images so intense they leave me conflicted.. Very nicely done!!!
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Thanks!
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Yes, this is one best read aloud, to appreciate the word play and the visuals each little tongue twist spawns–almost playful, and yet the message isn’t playful at all. I especially loved “I step on a fury of roses..” A wonderful image, along with so many others.
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Yay! Finally a comment of mine posted!!!
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Thanks!!
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I think you are just playing with words here. Wait, did I just make that sound like a bad thing?
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Lol! Yep!
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Yes, this is definitely one to be read aloud…In fact I did. “Bleach baby beach bones” Now who wouldn’t want to have that spill from their tongue?
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So glad you enjoyed it!
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A bed of roses isn’t all what it seems to be. Really a lot of obstacles even in the good life.
I was with the moaning seals, people do that when I try to sing and also when I try to tell a joke.
..
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Ahahaha! That’s great.
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Terrifying. Everything seems to blossom and then bite down.
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The play on words was brilliant in this dark poem of terror.
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