Is it still stoning out?
Those granite days
when the sky is
so hard
the colors of our eyes
are whetstone
and the birds
sound like flint
across the water.
For The Twiglets
The Quantumverse
Is it still stoning out?
Those granite days
when the sky is
so hard
the colors of our eyes
are whetstone
and the birds
sound like flint
across the water.
For The Twiglets
Excellent!
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Thank you! Qq – I added/dropped and “s” at the end of whetstone about a dozen times. What say you?
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Or other variants?
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No s. Prefer the ambiguity of adj vs noun. – like granite.
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Ok, that’s where I landed. But thought I’d check since you parse things more closely than most people! Thanks!
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Ooo – a new tagline – “parses things more closely than most people” Perhaps on a coffee cup… (thanks!) LOL
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Maybe a picture of Bogart and Bacall – “Here’s parsing at you, kid”
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I like both but your revised “tightened” version has the winning edge for me.
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Whew! Always easy to break things that don’t need to be fixed… Thanks.
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You do the forms really well, q! (I never take it for granite.)
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Ahahaha! Thanks.
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Hmmm, not sure how this ended up tagged Haiku. Gonna fix that.
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Definitely, a superb! poem packed with metaphors and imagery. I love this poem seriously. Good work.
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Thanks!!
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You’re welcome, qbit. 🙂
Words and poetry are such powerful gifts that we all possess.
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‘the colors of our eyes are whetstone’ -love this imagery!
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